SINGLE MOTHERS' CHECKLIST

A very simple list. Of course, everyone has different touch points or needs, and everyone is at a different place. Please don't hesitate to add.


A Plan
Before you leave the marriage, have in mind a plan that at least gets you through the first few months. By the end of those first few months, have formed a plan to get you to the end of the year. By the end of the first year, develop a three-to-five year plan. By the end of three to five years, depending on how old your kids are, try to have a plan to get them to the end of high school. At the same time, don't be afraid to take everything one day at a time, even one hour at a time.

One Primary Babysitter or Daycare

One Back-Up Babysitter
Everybody gets sick sometimes

Exact Location And Hours Of Closest Drop-In Day Care
Sometimes doubles as a play-place; often caters to older children

Intimate Knowledge Of What's Available To You Through Your Province's Child Care Subsidy

Intimate Knowledge Of What's Available To You Through Your Province's Supplemental Health Insurance Subsidy
Might pay for kids glasses, dental visits or unusual or expensive medications like EpiPens

Emergency Pick-Up Person
An adult who can pick up your kids from school or day care if something happens and there's no way you can get there quickly; it works well if it could be a parent in your neighborhood whose kids you can do the same for.

Smart Divorce Lawyer
Ask women you know and trust who have been divorced. Should be the kind of lawyer who knows the difference between judges who favour women in family law cases and judges who don't.

Comfy Place To Live
Just a place that feels safe and comfortable for you and your kids to come home to; doesn't have to be fancy

Fulfilling Work
If you like your work, it will contribute amazingly to a peaceful household.

Extremely Reliable Car
Ugliness is of no consequence

Loving Car Mechanic
You don't have to be married to have a guy in your life that you love who loves your car; one single mother friend of mine does admit to wanting to marry her incredibly helpful and trustworthy car mechanic.

CAA Road Service Membership
A highly essential, very non-Cinderella-like way to be rescued

Knowledge Of Places In Your Town To Get Best Deals On Kids' Clothes And Groceries
SuperStore!

One Trusted Buddy Who Completely Understands And Who Will Loan You Money In An Emergency No Questions Asked
Quite often another single mother or someone raised by one

Little Gifts Of Appreciation For This Beloved Pal Who Stands By You
Can be something very small

Reliable 24 Hour Plumber
A lot of plumbers advertising themselves as offering 24 hour service in the Yellow Pages do not even answer the phone in the middle of the night, let alone show up. Ask a neighbour.

Basic Tool Box
You'll be happy to have this lying around; it can be VERY empowering. Myriads of choices available at Canadian Tire for around $40.

Back-Up Joe Job
Some sort of free-lance or temp-type work you can easily tap into and get paid for quickly if something goes topsy-turvy. It doesn't matter how menial, or how unrelated to your regular work.

Empowering Book
The Complete Single Mother by Andrea Engber and Leah Klungness

Big Dog
Sleeps at the front door to guard the house; makes you and your children feel protected and watched over at a vulnerable moment

One Easily Digested Bedside Novel With A Beautifully Constructed Plot And A Happy Ending

No Matter What, Always, A Few Bucks In The Bank

Did I leave something out? Of course I did. Please feel free to add! One piece of knowledge that you take for granted may be just the thing someone out there is looking for.